Time heals.

Two months ago, if anyone told me that I would be waking up at 3am to cycle 80km while ploughing through a thunderstorm (and praying that my eyelash extensions don’t fall off) and getting back into bed before the sun rises, I would have laughed so loud. So, I’ve learnt to NEVER SAY NEVER.

The most endurance I’ve done was during the time when I ran 20km in the morning and 6km in the evening everyday for three months – but that was for vanity and I just wanted to lose weight. Plus I was starving myself and I was 18 (holy shit has it been 12 years already?!) and scratching myself till I bled. And then I got burnt out and hated exercise for the next few years.

Now this has become a lifestyle and I actually enjoy it. Crazy? Perhaps. Lol. I train six times a week, two times a day now and most days you really just want to go back to sleep instead of waking up before the sun rises to train. But you just have to keep reminding yourself of your goals and once you’re out there pounding the pavement or attacking the quiet pre-dawn roads on two wheels, you will be fine. It’s all about finding your passion and doing it because you like to do it, and not because you want to be thinner. That’s a really dangerous path to tread.

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I remember the times when I was afraid of the sea and would be really stiff in the open water because I kept worrying what’s beneath. On Sunday though, I went for an open water swim at Tanjong Beach and I realised I wasn’t scared anymore, even when I swam into seaweed and it got entangled in my armpits. This brings me to the point that we can overcome our fears and there’s a lot more to ourselves that we don’t realise.

I also took a moment to step back and look at my life now – and I’m happy because LIFE IS AWESOME now. The past two months were really bad for me, but it’s over now and I just want to put it all behind. Don’t focus on stuff that keep you down; instead, be appreciative of all the positive things big or small because there is so much to be grateful for. I have a wonderful support network who stood by me when my heart got slashed again and again from the betrayal, I have a freaking cool Rock The Naked Truth community and hey, I’ve never looked or felt better about myself in a long, long time.

Time heals all and at one point it was hard to believe that I would recover. You just get stuck in that dark place and you wish the healing process would quicken. But you need to be patient with the healing, you need to feel the full brunt of the pain before you can rise.

Sometimes, you have to step back in order to move forward. Sometimes, you have to lose something in order to gain something better. You are in no competition with anyone. Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.

Don’t ever let someone tell you that you can’t do something. Not even me. You got a dream, you gotta protect it. When people can’t do something themselves, they’re gonna tell you that you can’t do it. You want something, go get it. Period.” – Will Smith in The Pursuit of Happyness

That’s right – don’t let anyone stop you from chasing your dreams and following your passion. A lot of times we compromise our values and principles just to get someone’s approval and that’s not healthy.

You do you.

I honestly never thought I would be training for an Ironman 70.3 race but you just keep discovering more about yourself and don’t let anyone hold you back.

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For what it’s worth: it’s never too early or, in my case, too late to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, just start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it.

And I hope you experience things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.

So go on and be yourself, be the person you want to be and don’t keep living under others’ expectations, or compromising on your values and principles because of a man you love. You have to understand that if you lose yourself in order to be with someone, you run the risk of falling apart if he walks away.

Ultimately, if you lose someone but find yourself, YOU win.

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Sometimes, your good intentions get misinterpreted and it hurts, but at least you know you tried. Don’t dwell on it – you can’t save the world. And don’t let it stop you from giving from the heart. There is a lot of good going around still and a lot of good things await you.

When life gives you 100 reasons to feel lousy, you just need to give yourself ONE reason to feel happy and keep you going. There will always be people who will pull you down, there will always be people who take advantage of your kindness, but never, ever, lose sight of who you are and the greater person you can be.

Real people still exist, but too many people are busy overlooking them. Some people are so stuck on who hurt them or who did them wrong that they close their hearts off from experiencing something better. Sometimes, even your fear of what happened in the past, can ruin what you have today. The focus should be on becoming a better person, so you can attract someone who aligns with your soul; not being overprotective out of fear that someone will hurt you. Create from love, not pain. Create from inner peace, not fear. Start healing and shifting your focus, so you can experience something genuine.

To all the angels in my life, THANK YOU. From here, it’s time to rock and roll baby!!

This is the new Cheryl Tay.

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