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Realigning.

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 24 Sep 2017   Posted by Cheryl Tay


The blinding headlights were flashing, the horn was blaring into the moist air of the post-rain dawn and I could hear the brakes screeching (jarringly) as if they were desperately clawing deep into the tarmac to find grip in the wet.

My heart was in my throat – the container truck was headed straight for me.


The mid-ride thunderstorm had already ceased and I was breathing a sigh of relief that I didn’t have to fight against the rain anymore (although the winds were still cold and strong).

I unclipped my left foot, as I always do when slowing down at a traffic light junction, and stopped with my front wheel turned to the right, to prepare to make a U-turn. Cars were zooming by and spraying a bit of water onto me, but I was too tired to react.

It was about 6am in the morning.

Suddenly I noticed there were no more vehicles. I wearily looked up and saw the traffic light was red, so I pushed off on my right foot (still clipped in) to execute the U-turn. And that was when I put myself in a near-death situation – I had turned right into the path of a container truck. Oh fuck.

The red traffic light I saw was the one perpendicular to me at the cross-junction! Shit, shit, shit. I couldn’t pedal backwards and my left foot was still unclipped, and in my panic I couldn’t get the left foot clipped in as it kept slipping on the wet pedal. All I could do was use my right foot to keep pushing to the side of the road – and pray.

Everything happened so quickly.

Just as I reached the side of the road, the container truck just managed to swerve and avoid me. The gust of wind shook me hard as he rumbled past me… just inches away. He then stopped his vehicle, right there in the middle of the road, just to stare at me angrily.

It was my fault entirely. How the fuck could I have read the traffic light wrongly? I could only apologise, raising my hand meekly with my head slightly bowed. He drove off after a lorry came up behind us and honked at us to move on (the lorry driver had no idea what just happened).

There was a bus stop just ahead, so I stopped to collect myself. I was shaken from what just happened and gulping hard to swallow that lump in my throat. I am very, very fortunate that I came out of this incident unscathed. It could have gone much, much worse. And no, your life doesn’t flash in front of your eyes, unlike what movies often portray. I was just thinking of how to get out of danger asap!

Upon some deep reflection, this served as a wake-up call for me to declutter my life.

There’s just been too many things going on in my life lately and I’m being worn down. For the past two weeks since I got back from Japan, I’ve been feeling very, very fatigued. Initially I passed it off as PMS, which usually makes me lethargic – a kind of tired that you can’t fight with sleep or food.

But as the days wore on, I found myself becoming sick of everything. I was having problems waking up everyday, I was dragging myself to training and even things that usually excite me started to feel like a burden.

Triathlon training is my highly-lauded ‘me time’ that I always look forward to, but I started to question the purpose of my commitment to the sport more and found it harder to find the motivation to continue the daily grind. This was really bad because you know how much triathlons mean to me, but suddenly I feel like it’s consuming too much of me – not just physically, but emotionally too.

These questions kept coming up – How long are you gonna do this for? How much more are you gonna spend (the recent Queen Bitch I incident didn’t help)? What do you want to get out of this? It’s only a hobby, don’t you think you are taking it too seriously? Are you trying to be a full-time athlete? All the time you’re putting into the sport (training, racing, getting stuff sorted for the sport etc), don’t you think you can better use it elsewhere?

Internally I was fighting a battle harder than ever – I usually can answer these swiftly and easily with legit justification but lately I had hesitation because my mind was weak from all the fatigue in my life.

I don’t have a deadline to how long I want to do this sport; obviously I want to do this for as long as I can. I guess there will be a time in my life where I might have to cut back on spending and training and racing; like when I get married and start a family for example. But to be honest, right now I am happy with the progress and I have settled into this lifestyle that I’m comfortable with.

The financial bit is starting to eat into me though – admittedly I’ve spent quite a bit on this sport and it was still manageable, until I moved to my bachelorette pad and the bills started to pile up along with the housing loan. It is easy to get carried away and throw your entire life into the sport, but I have to remember that my work has to come first because if there’s no work, then I’ll have no money for the sport. I’m sure this is commonly experienced by the other “lifestyle athletes” (which I define as normal people with normal jobs who have great sporting aspirations) too.

Thankfully, I enjoy my work and I’m always grateful that I am able to make a career out of my passions.

Well, I don’t intend to give up the sport or quit being competitive in it; it’s just that I found it harder to answer to myself than usual that’s all. And it’s time to tighten the purse strings too.

So I was just becoming very stressed and I was carrying a black face everywhere, I was highly irritable and I was struggling to control my emotions. In short, I wasn’t fun to be around and I was giving out negative energy to others. And I also believe that when you’re negative, you will attract more negativity – so for some reason, I kept getting into disagreements with people and it drained me further. On that note, I apologise if I was being a bitch.

After speaking to a few close friends, who understandingly tolerated my tantrums (love you guys), I realised it’s time to do a realignment of priorities. I’m just one person and I cannot be doing everything, as much as I would like to. I’m human too.

Kelly gave me this piece of awesome advice (bless her beautiful soul) – write down a list of things that you are doing in your life now, eg. work, external projects outside of your work such as church or volunteer stuff, training, family, friends, relationship, pets etc. Are you getting your priorities right? How much time are you spending on each one? Are you misplacing your effort and energy?

If you’re like me and want to get your hands into everything, the prioritising is DAMN HARD can… because I want to do everything! Unfortunately we only have 24 hours in a day and there’s only so much we can do.

The sport of triathlon is something I enjoy and I always believe that it’s time to take a step back if you stop finding joy in what you do. I am in Phuket for a week now and even though I’m a bit tired of airports and travelling, I think this trip is timely because I can refresh myself some; more mentally than physically since I will still be training but it is the soul that feeds the body anyway. Being away from Singapore always helps and I am totally appreciating this downtime. I am just sprawled on the bed in the apartment with no plans and nothing to do for the rest of the day after a long ride this morning. It’s been a while since I’ve had a quiet Sunday like this!

Don’t get me wrong – I love my ‘happening’ life but I think I need to learn how to manage my rest properly. Not just getting more sleep, but finding time to chill and reset so I can get going again.

During this weary time, I’ve also learnt that life is too short to load yourself with unnecessary drama. If you think you’ve done what you could, then just move on. These things can really wear you down more than you think. You already have so many things on your hands; learn to take care of yourself first.

Oops, this went on longer than I expected. I haven’t shared my feelings this intimately since last year, but thank you for “listening” and I hope you can learn something out of it too. I will soldier on and hey, the rainbow is just on the other side. Life is like cycling; you go down one direction against the headwind but you will come back down the other direction with the tailwind and FLY. Where there’s an uphill, there will always be a downhill. Sending lots of love your way too!! xx

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Written by Cheryl Tay

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    First establishing herself in the world of cars and motorsports, Cheryl Tay is a sports and fitness blogger who advocates living an active and healthy lifestyle. Founder of body image movement Rock The Naked Truth, Cheryl overcame over a decade of eating disorders and is now passionate about helping people with similar struggles. She also has a running club ROCKrunners and a tri-enthusiast club ROCKtri.

    Rock The Naked Truth encourages others to be comfortable in their own skin and to learn that there is more to life than just being a slave to the numbers on your scale. Truly, life has more meaning than just forcing yourself to look good - it's most important to be happy and feel good about yourself!

    Previously...
    > Fitness columnist for Yahoo! Sports
    > Founder of ELITE (fitness competition)
    > Motoring writer for TODAY
    > Columnist for Rev / Run magazines
    > Official photographer for ONE Championship
    > Media manager for Formula Drift Asia
    > PR manager for PETRONAS Syntium Team
    > Business development for Kartright Speedway
    > F1 youth speaker for Singapore GP
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    Had a nice walk in the cool Flower Dome with my pa Had a nice walk in the cool Flower Dome with my parents to see the Dahlia flower display specially for the CNY period.

Moments like these are precious and I hope to spend as much time as I can with my parents - I like how I can impromptu jio them out and they are always game to try food or go gai gai with me!

#gardensbythebay
#flowerpower
    Half my right butt cheek is bruised now (it's turn Half my right butt cheek is bruised now (it's turning black and purple) from denting the ladder in yday's silly home incident, but I would like to take a moment to appreciate this solid (heavy) thicc butt of mine... because it got me out of a bad fall situation unscathed.

Jokes aside, I do occasionally feel like my butt is too big, has too many stretch marks and too much cellulite, and it makes me not want to wear a bikini. I'll see other butts and be like, how come they have such a nice peach shaped ass whereas mine just looks like an overstuffed pillow.

BUT I brush these thoughts away quickly because I love this butt of mine, flaws and all. Poor ladder though!

#rockthenakedtruth
    Boys bailed on us girls so it was just @sarahhy0r1 Boys bailed on us girls so it was just @sarahhy0r1n and I and we decided to take on the hills of the South. Spent all morning grunting and cursing and swearing, hahahahaha!

#cheryltayworksout #triathlon #triathlete #trifit #trilife #trilove #trigirls #getfit #lovefit #fitforlife #fitness #fitnesseveryday #instafit #igfit #ironmantri #ironmantraining #activelife #cycling #thecyclinglife
    Some roller skating action with @jadeseah this arv Some roller skating action with @jadeseah this arvo. Well, not really a lot of action because it's my first time trying roller skating so we mostly just went round and round. It's different from inline skating, harder!

P.S. like my Hello Kitty socks? Heehee

#rollerskating #roundandround
    Found this in my archives. A time in 2011 when I h Found this in my archives. A time in 2011 when I had long permed hair and youth (and non existent eyebrows) on my side. Wow. I like my eyebrows better now, thank goodness for eyebrow embroidery hahahaha.

#throwback #nojudging #pastorpresent

📷: @ansonchew
    After setting up @rockthenakedtruthsg, I started t After setting up @rockthenakedtruthsg, I started to learn more about body image and I came to a realisation that the more attractive one is, the more likely he/she is insecure about their body.

You would think otherwise because they have a 'great body' with skinny legs, thigh gap, small waist, "11" abs, nice boobs (for girls), but they are actually not as confident as you think they are.

People would die for these bodies, people are dieting and doing stupid things to get this kind of body, but these 'more attractive' people are actually insecure about the very body society desires.

Why insecure? I spoke to some of them and they cited reasons like: Afraid to lose the body because they feel their identity is tied to their body, afraid they may not look like that one day, afraid they do not look good enough.

So my hope is that everyone will come to accept their body no matter how it looks, and not be afraid to be judged. I mean, who gives these people a right to judge you?

Your body, own it!

#rockthenakedtruth
    No such thing as too pink. 🤭🤭🤭 Queen Bit No such thing as too pink. 🤭🤭🤭

Queen Bitch II always makes me so proud.

#rockthenakedtruth #cheryltayworksout #triathlon #triathlete #trifit #trilife #trilove #trigirls #getfit #lovefit #fitforlife #fitness #fitnesseveryday #instafit #igfit #ironmantri #ironmantraining #activelife #cycling #thecyclinglife
    Wooooo managed to get some speedy action (on a wet Wooooo managed to get some speedy action (on a wet track which made things so slippery) thanks to @audisingapore! Oh my back and arms... how did I use to race those kart endurance races 10 years ago? 🤣🤣🤣

#audisingapore #gokarting #aging #motorsports #motorracing #karting #kartracing #vroomvroom
    Had so much fun at the @grityardsg x @jyanyogastud Had so much fun at the @grityardsg x @jyanyogastudio collab event today where we got to do a combo of HIIT then acro yoga, an opportunity to try 2 types of workouts in one session, to see how fitness can be translated across different activities!

I wanted @jyanyoga to base me just for ONE photo, but she ended up sending me into several moves, which scared me a little but with the help of @branstands, I got into a few poses so now I have a few photos to share. Yay!

To more of such collabs!!!

📷: @_yaops_

#GRITYARDSG #jyanyogastudio #acroyoga
    HELLO 2021! Thank YOU for being here with me thro HELLO 2021!

Thank YOU for being here with me through my journey of life, as I grow and progress. You, my IG fam, are a significant part of support network! Happy new year everybahdee!!

😘😘😘🥰🥰🥰❤❤❤

P.S. Let me know what kind of content you want to see more from me?

#happynewyear #2021
    My favourite 9 photos of 2020! Even though this ye My favourite 9 photos of 2020! Even though this year took us down different paths, it has still been a very fulfilling year for me and I am grateful for everything that I have - my health, my family, my work, my friends, my sports.

Here's a quick recap of how my 2020 went:

1) Kicked off the year with @rockthenakedtruthsg's 4th anniversary with a track relay event that had 100 participants, supported by Moulmein-Cairnhill CSC

2) Spent a weekend at integrated fitness resort Thanyapura Phuket for @teampurpose's inaugural retreat

3) Passed my Class 2B test and bought a motorbike (Honda CBR150R)

4) Raced in the Ironman 70.3 Bangsaen, my only race for the year

5) Appointed Editor for @runsg

6) Got my own wakeboarding gear, woooo!

7) Opened up about my Pruvit journey and how it has changed my life, as well as shared about the benefits of ketones

8) Did lots of live stuff like IG live workouts for @100plus_singapore and also a live FB launch for @theragunsg

9) Did my second strategically nude shoot with @ivanjoshualoh for @rockthenakedtruthsg

10) Had the privilege to work on key campaigns with brands like @aveenosg, @huawei.sg, @jaybirdsport, and also produced virtual content for Moulmein-Cairnhill CSC and Sengkang East CSC

11) Ran the second edition of @100plus_singapore's OUTDO YOURSELF 2020 programme and trained 5 individuals @tngying @bec010 @reneetee72 @channelweng @angmo_kantang for the @sgmarathon Grand Finale

12) Created content with and for homegrown brands @teampurpose and @grityardsg, implementing several key launches and initiatives

13) Collaborated with @our.braletteclub, @goyathelabel, @standsg, @sloggisg, @huawei.sg on campaigns for @rockthenakedtruthsg

14) Started going into video production in the role of a producer and helping to produce videos

15) Got a new car - traded my 5yo VW Golf for a Honda Civic

16) Revamped my humble bachelorette pad, which is now so cosy and feeling more like a home

Thank you to all who have continued to support me and believe in me, both in the personal and career space. The year has turned out differently from planned, but it still turned out good!

How has 2020 gone for you?
    Following my house revamp, it's now time for some Following my house revamp, it's now time for some deep cleaning. Since I've moved in 3.5 years ago, I've not done any deep cleaning so there is definitely work to be done heh.

The @surecleansg professional cleaning team came over to work on my home and I was so impressed with their cleaning! (You know you're upping your auntie level when you get excited seeing things get cleaned and get intrigued by these fancy cool machines.) You can swipe to see the before/after results!

For my bachelorette space of 600 sqft, they sent a team of 3 who worked on the place simultaneously. Altogether they took 4 hours for the Home Deep Cleaning and Disinfection; sofa and mattress cleaning are add-ons to the package. 

They also have their own products, like their own Germclean disinfectant that has silver ion technology and 24h residual disinfection and can last on surfaces for 30 days, which they used on my home AND you can purchase to use too.

Quote 'CHERYLTAYSG' to get 15% off with min. spend of $250 before GST. You can book on sureclean.com.sg!

#sureclean #homecleaning
    Who can say no to ice cream or froyo? And when it Who can say no to ice cream or froyo? And when it has NO SUGAR ADDED, that's even better.

@yolesingapore has opened their newest outlet at Vivocity and the ice cream and froyo served all have NO sugar added! Soon, the rest of the outlets will follow suit.

But hey, don't use this as an excuse to go mad on the toppings ya!

Use 'CHERYLxYOLE' to get $1 off their NO SUGAR ADDED ice cream and froyo at Yole Vivocity from now to 31 December.

P.S. the photo wall damn cute!

#yolesingapore #yolevivocity #nosugaradded
    Someone came over today and made himself very comf Someone came over today and made himself very comfortable on my couch whilst watching Bee Movie for the 100000000th time.

#spotthehuman
    Not shown in picture - my pink socks and pink bicy Not shown in picture - my pink socks and pink bicycle. 🤣🤣🤣 Only one way to spend Christmas, all decked out in pink for a 160km ride. MERRY CHRISTMAS everybahdee!!

#cheryltayworksout #triathlon #triathlete #trifit #trilife #trilove #trigirls #getfit #lovefit #fitforlife #fitness #fitnesseveryday #instafit #igfit #ironmantri #ironmantraining #activelife #teampurpose #purposeasia #cycling #thecyclinglife
    Home revamp completed! 🥰🥰🥰 I've been spen Home revamp completed! 🥰🥰🥰 I've been spending a lot more time at home this year, which gave me the push to make some improvements to the house so I can be more comfortable at home.

It's been 3.5 years since I moved in, but I've mostly just treated this as a house, somewhere to stay, and not really put the effort to make it a home home.

When I first moved in, I wasn't keen to do up the house much because I felt that I might get married one day and move out, so why bother to spend money? So I only added a counter to separate the kitchenette from the living area, and set up my bike trainer next to the sofa.

These made the house quite cluttered and it just got messier and messier over the years as I accumulated more stuff, and was often too tired or busy to clear up. I mean, it was just me and I don't invite friends over, so I let the mess manifest.

Finally, I decided to revamp the place and I'm glad I did!

I got rid of the counter, built cupboards and shelves into the walls for more storage space, got zip blinds so I could convert the balcony into a usable space, did vinyl flooring over the original glossy floor which is hard to maintain (and I was wearing bedroom slippers all the time), and got a dining table set that doubles up as my work station.

The result is amazing! I wish I could say this was a DIY project, but no, I engaged the services for the various things I did... after taking time to source for the best deals with value and quality!

The home feels like a home now and this might sound strange, but having more physical space actually has a calming effect on me and psychologically I feel better!

If you have any budget home decor ideas, please share! My only decor ideas are multiple stuffed toys and Hello Kitty memorabilia lol.

Now I'm looking forward to hosting friends at my revamped space I call home!

#homesweethome
    One good thing about the frozen meals from Not Jus One good thing about the frozen meals from Not Just CarrotSticks is that you can take it straight from the freezer into the microwave oven. In just 5 minutes, your plant-based meal is ready!

The plastic sheet will peel off by itself once the food is heated, so all you need to do is peel it off and you're good to start eating.

I've tried all 3 meals and they taste good! The Thai basil chicken and the beef rendang are quite spicy, but I'm terrible with chilli so it should be fine for you.

You can order online at notjustcarrotsticks.com and use SOCIAL20% to get 20% off all products (limited to one use per customer only).

You can also purchase them exclusively at Bukit Timah Plaza NTUC Finest and Parkway Parade NTUC Finest for the month of December.

#plantbased #notjustcarrotsticks #sp
    [GIVEAWAY: 3 x visors from @greybyortenhill] Some [GIVEAWAY: 3 x visors from @greybyortenhill]

Sometimes, all you need is just one accessory to make your look cooler. Cue my Super.visor from @greybyortenhill! I love how it goes well with active wear, outdoor wear, beach wear... so long as you're in the sun, it completes the look.

I'm giving away 3 visors (of your choice) to 3 people. They have the half (which I'm wearing here) and the full, and a few different colour options. My favourites are the gold (seen here) and the rainbow.

To take part, follow my IG and @greybyortenhill, and tell me in the comments below how you will wear this, eg. what outfit will you match this with, where will you go with this etc.

I will choose the winners by Sunday 2359h!

#supervisor
    PERIOD FATIGUE. Besides belly bloat, water retenti PERIOD FATIGUE. Besides belly bloat, water retention, moodiness and junk food cravings, the other thing I struggle with, during PMS, is the fatigue. The fatigue is real!

I find myself needing to sleep more, getting tired more easily, and even after sleeping more, I still feel tired?! What is this! Do you feel sluggish too?

Also, in the few days leading up to day 1 of the period, your athletic performance is likely to be affected so don't be hard on yourself if you don't find yourself hitting your targets or doing weaker than usual. You might want to chill a bit prior to the period, OR, manage your expectations and don't let it affect you mentally when you don't perform at the level you're used to.

Interestingly, I read that the body is the strongest in the first few days of the period! But with the heavy flow and the cramps, it's hard to feel pumped yknow.

Whatever it is, I continue to exercise through my period. You just gotta manage the intensity, effort and expectations!

P.S. Wearing the @teampurpose x @zachbitter running singlet in XS that is lightweight and comfy, and the women's high waisted 4" running shorts in M that is great for the no-thigh gap so you don't get abrasion from the bunching up of shorts between the thighs.

P.P.S. The gap on my medal holder is supposed to be for the 3 major races I signed up to complete in 2020 - Challenge Roth, Berlin Marathon and the Ironman 70.3 World Championship in Taupo, New Zealand. It will be filled eventually I believe - a part of me is like, whew the pain will come later; whilst another part of me is like, damn I wanted to get the pain over and done with. Either way, it's akan datang (Malay for coming soon)!

#cheryltayworksout #triathlon #triathlete #trifit #trilife #trilove #trigirls #getfit #lovefit #fitforlife #fitness #fitnesseveryday #instafit #igfit #ironmantri #ironmantraining #activelife #teampurpose #purposeasia #cycling #thecyclinglife
    When you think of a plant-based diet, some of you When you think of a plant-based diet, some of you might visualise eating carrot sticks, celery and cabbage, but there's more to a plant-based diet than just vegetables.

Not Just CarrotSticks offers plant-based frozen ready meals that are filling and nutritious. They go straight from the freezer to your plate in just 5 minutes so you don't have to worry about thawing. So convenient!

With both Asian and Western choices, the meals are 100% from plants, meat-free, vegan and halal. They also have a Fibre+ range for additional fibre and vitamins to help with digestion. Each meal costs less than $10 and can be kept frozen for three months. No MSG and preservatives are used as well.

If you wish to try, you can order online at notjustcarrotsticks.com and use SOCIAL20% to get 20% off all products (limited to one use per customer only). You can also purchase them exclusively at Bukit Timah Plaza NTUC Finest and Parkway Parade NTUC Finest for the month of December.

#plantbased #notjustcarrotsticks #sp
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