Different people have different ways of approaching problems and tackling them. Be it at work, at home or with your partners, there are bound to be conflicting opinions on what the issue is and how to resolve it. When one party is not on the same wavelength as the other at any of the following five stages, the issue will become challenging and harder to solve.
After all the arguments and debates with friends, colleagues, family or the boyfriend, I came up with this process of problem solving, explained in five stages. More often than that, both parties are at different stages thus the conflict is unable to be resolved. Hopefully, this might offer some help to get both on the same page and work on addressing the issue together.
Cheryl Tay’s 5As of Problem Solving
Aware
The first step to any issue is to bring attention to it and identifying the problem. The other party might be oblivious that there is a problem, so you might have to talk to them and make them aware of it.. or vice versa if someone brings it up to you.
Acknowledge
When the issue is brought up, will the other side acknowledge it or deny that there is an issue? This is the stage where both parties accept that the issue exists.
Agree
If both acknowledge that there is an issue, do they then agree that something needs to be done about it? How willing is each side to make the effort to solve the problem?
Analyse
After establishing that something needs fixing, it’s time to analyse various solutions. Basically, this is the part where you thrash things out.
Action
Of the solutions discussed, which is the one that will be best for both of you in light of the circumstances? Come to a compromise, decide on the final solution, then take action and implement it.
In short, once you are made aware of something, you acknowledge that it is an issue then agree that something has to be done. Explore and analyse different ways to address the issue, then decide on the best one and apply it. Sometimes one side might feel nothing needs to be done, or both sides cannot reach a consensus on the solution, leaving the issue unresolved. Next time, try relating these five stages to your conflict and it may help you to understand why you are stuck.
